Time had most certainly went by so fast! Melissa and I moved to Danville, Va. (closer to my in-laws) in July '08. It's the best decision the girls and I had made but Danica decided to stay back in Maryland while in college. I stayed out of touch for several months while our basement was being finished, no computer nor tv. Finally had it done before Christmas.

Melissa had a hard time adjusting with the new public school so she is now attending a very small Christian School, like "Little House On The Praire". There's 16 kids, all ages, in one classroom. She likes it and she's doing a lot better than when she was in public school.

I haven't decided on what to do with myself so for the meantime I am enjoying being a mother, preparing Melissa's breakfast, packing her lunch and driving her back and forth to school. Besides, I'm still unpacking some more boxes from our move and the weather has gotten better the last few days so I started walking with Harrison (our puppy) again.

I really don't have the initiative to do anything productive per say. I just want to live day by day. I miss Dave so much that it hurts but he is in a better place and one day, someday I will be with him through eternity! I live my life with that thought. My God had promised me so!

It's nice to be back!

Edith

There has been so much things going on since the last time I updated. I had surgery on the 16th of January (complete Thyroidectomy) done at the Naval Hospital in Bethesda, the same O.R. Dept. where Dave used to work. Dr. Sorensen, my surgeon, said that Dave left a good legacy and he was loved by everybody he worked with and they were going to take care of me. I was given the privilege to choose the team who performed my surgery which I'm sure that Dave would have done the same if he was there.

I've decided against building a house in Va. and bought one that's already built. I purchased a house that went into foreclosure a few days after we put a contract. It was put in an auction and I was the highest bidder (I was the only one bidding). It's 3 bedroom, brick house, only 4 years old outside the city of Danville. Everybody says that it was a steal! I just need to have the yard fenced in for Harrison (our puppy) and for the kids (nieces and nephews), build a deck, finish the basement, change the counter top and buy new appliances. I also have to paint the walls.

I've started getting our house here in MD ready to be put on the market. I've been painting walls, patching holes and get all my daycare materials out of the playroom. Painting is therapeutic but it's hard to get out of bed the next day. Old age is settling in!

Danica had her first accident while I was in Va. She rear ended a new pick up truck and thanked God she is alright and didn't do much damage on truck; just have to change the bumper so we didn't have to get the insurance involved. The driver was very nice and he said, "That is why they call it accident".

Harrison is a very lucky dog! He got out of the yard and was hit by a car two weeks ago (while I was in Va). Garrett (Danica's friend) , said that he was dragged under the car for about 30 feet. He suffered road burn on his belly and spent the night at the hospital. No broken bones!

Jocelyn and her family will be flying in to the the East Coast at the end of June and they will be here for a week. We will be joining them (her 2 sisters and their families) in Ocean City together with my sisters-in-law and their gang for a few days and then off to Canada. It's an apportunity for me to get sooo drunk and might wake from this nightmare that I'm at!

It's still hard to fall asleep at night, just lay there and have to make myself believe that Dave is and will never be coming back.

Everybody says that things will get better as time goes by. I can't wait for that time! Moving might make it better since I will be closer to Dave. I can go visit him anytime I want and I will be closer to his family but part of me doesn't want to leave home!

My love to all!
Edith

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Robert and Barbie & their boys spent the New Year with us here in Maryland. After a long day of delivering cars to his clients, Robert came home to grill steaks for our New Year's Eve dinner. Danica's boyfriend joined us for dinner and they left to see their friends. Waiting for 2008 to ring in, we settled down for a movie marathon; "Sweet Home Alabama" is our favorite!

Dave's headstone came just in time for Christmas. (Angie gave the company a visit after they left me a long message about their machine, use for engraving, being broken. A little pushed went a long way!) It came out beautiful. His boat with him fishing, catching a big bass, me sitting at the back was engraved on the headstone.

Last year, on Christmas Eve, Dave was with us singing "12 Days of Christmas" on their Dad and their brother Billy Joe's graves. We had to sing it for him this Christmas! Barbie picked up a CD with the song, "If You Only Knew" which was played also. We lit up candles and turned the battery operated lights on the Christmas trees that the girls and I put on his grave.

Danica continued one of her Dad's "Christmas tradition". She gave me a set Victoria's Secret PJ for Christmas which I always get from Dave for the last few years. And for my birthday, she gave me purse. My sisters-in-law gave me a framed poem, "Merry Christmas From Heaven".

I am not sure if there are stages for grieving. All I want is to see and talk to him even just in my dreams but I seldom have dreams with him in it. He must have been busy fishing!

The blueprints for our house to be built in Va is finally done. I will probably go back to VA. in 2 weeks to talk to different builders unless my surgery will be scheduled before then. I have multiple thyroid nodules in which one had grown significantly since March '07. I had a needle biopsy done before the holidays which came out benign but I am not on the safe side yet because of the sizes of the nodules.

The girls are doing fine. Danica is busy with work, school and boyfriend. Melissa has her days, sometimes as sweet as she could be! Our puppy, Harrison, turned out to be a brat but we love him! If only Ryan is not scared of him, "Life is Good".

Thank you to all my friends who sent us Christmas and Holiday cards! I appreciate your love and thoughtfulness.

Love,
Edith

It's been three long months! We've been back to Va. twice since then and we will go back next week for Thanksgiving. The girls and I decided that we should be moving sooner than what Dave and I had planned. We're supposed to stay here in Maryland until Melissa is done with her surgery (orthonetic) which will be next summer, when she turns 16 years old but it's lonely here. All of my in-laws want us to get moving--they worry too much! We will just have to look for a new Oral Surgeon and a Cranio-facial Team. Melissa needs a break anyways, hang out with her cousins before starting a new school.

Dave and I had purchased 3 lots in a new subdivision in Va. last Feb. and we will be building our house on 2 of the lots. We will be 10 minutes away from Barbie and 7 min. from the city of Danville, which is great! Hope we could get started early next year.

I've started volunteering at church for "Wonderful Wednesdays" for an hour, Bible study for the kids. I need Wonderful Wednesdays myself. It's been so hard but I have to function for the girls. I have a list to do before putting our house in the market but I just don't know where to start. Harrison (the puppy) is keeping me busy--he likes taking me for a walk even if it's raining. Thank goodness, he is little--when he gets tired, he wouldn't move so I have to carry him.

After receiving Dave's insurance from the navy, they set me up with a Financial Advisor, which is a free service. (They don't want there service member's funds to be spent in vain.) They even have to pay for a local financial advisor to meet with me at home. I don't like talking to my CPA/finacial advisor, he gives me a headache! So, I have to find an new CPA to do my taxes next year. I have an old guy advisor from Morgan Stanley whom I've never met, decided don't like him too. I'll just do it on my own! Got nothing better to do anyways. The Financial Advisor called me yesterday and he said that he is preparing a financial plan for me 'till I reached the age of 90. I told him that I couldn't wait that long.

We finally ordered Dave's headstone and mine last month when we were in Va. He asked me if I could put my name with his, so I am going to have it done. Our picture together will be put on the headstone. Jocelyn said that it's not fair because if I die when I'm old and wrinkled, my picture on the headstone will always be young. Well, it's just one way of looking at the bright side.

I hope that you all have a very nice "Thanksgiving Holiday". I will be going shopping with my sisters-in-law on Wednesday and Danica said that I should take her shopping on Black Friday, buy her anything she wants since I'm making her stay in Va. for a week. I better get me a J-O-B, soon!

Edith

Melissa's Blog Page
Saturday, September 29, 2007

The girls and I made our first trip to the mall since Dave was gone. We made it through day but there were still quiet moments among the three of us. We went to see the movie, "Mr. Woodcock", which Dave would have enjoyed seeing it--he liked Billy Bob Thornthon. We had lunch and did some shoes and purse shopping--- can't have enough of them. Then, had to go home for our new puppy, Harrison, a beagle. I need a company while the girls are at school until I figure out what to do with myself. I just don't feel like going back to work or doing daycare anytime soon. I just don't have the motivation of making a living since I don't have a husband to grow old with. I know it's very selfish for me to think this way especially I have two girls but I can't help it. (I should eat plenty of bananas. Jocelyn had read an article about bananas, that it has a component which is good for depression!). Danica and I have started talking more about Dave lately. She had said that it's not fair, she knows a lot of kids her age who hate their dads... Melissa is still mad at her dad because she doesn't have any formal picture with him, like homecoming or prom while Danica had a few taken with him. She has started seeing a child pshycologist which I hope will help her cope her feelings. Danica said that she doesn't have time for counseling--- she goes to college full time, goes to work and started going out with this new boy. Myself, I don't like telling what I feel to somebody and I have quiet a few therapist around me; Dave's sisters, Jocelyn and my friend Angie. Sitting outside on the deck --- reading a book, drinking coffee, listening to Dave's favorite songs and talking to the puppy makes my day. Besides, I'm not done with never ending paper works and phone calls with VA, etc. Cleaning the house makes me cry so I just look at the mess but I have clean vehicles. The BBQ grill is very clean also!Well, I discovered a new trick to stop the girls from yelling at each other while I'm driving, just play the song, "Daddy's Hand". The three of us didn't make any noise. I've been driving his truck around more than I do mine. I like being in his truck!Everytime that I look at his picture, he is smiling at me. Barbie said that's good, he's happy for me. I have been reading all his letters that he sent me while he was out to sea for six months in 1996-1997. I also printed out our everyday e-mails from June to Aug. 2002 while he was on his last 6 months deployment. I think I ran out of ink why I stopped printing. I saved all his notes/letters that he had written for me while on his 24 hr. duty at work. On our 3rd month wedding anniversary, he drew 3 flowers on a page of my recipe notebook which I still have. He also started writing me letters during the 22 months that he was sick.All I could do is hold on to his promised, "Honey, I will make sure that I will be the first one to meet you when you get to Heaven". Only God knows how much I miss him. It hurts so bad but someday we will be together again!Edith

MEMORIAL SERVICE

Dave's Memorial Service was beyond my imagination but "BEAUTIFUL", a Full Military Memorial Service! Thank you so much to all of our military friends from all over the US who took their time to serve as Dave's Pall Bearers; HM3 Brandon West, National Naval Medical Center, Bethesda, Maryland, US Navy Retirees; HM1 Ben Abad of Germantown, MD, Chief Michael Howard of Florida, EO1 Lester Bylsma of Camarillo, CA. and Lt. Frank Arp of Maryland and Commander Gene Truesdell of the United States Navy.

It made me so proud that Dave had left a very special place in Cmdr. Gene Truesdell's heart. He was 4 hrs away from his command post, Lamore, CA when he learned that Dave had passed away. He had to drive back to Lamore to pick up his uniform, drove another 4 hrs to Oakland, Ca to catch his flight for Dulles Airport in VA that landed at 8:00 am, Friday. From the airport, he had to drive another 4 hrs to make the 1:00 pm memorial service to which he had it made a few minutes after it started.

Dave was remembered by his friends: John Fox, his cousin and best friend; Chris Fahrr from Phoenix, they'd met from the USS Cleveland in 1995; Chief Howard, they worked together at the hospital in Bethesda; Frank Arp, a long time friend who talked about how Dave would light up everytime the navy was brought in the conversation.

Jocelyn Bylsma, my only Filipino friend from Ca. (who is now being adopted by the Hoskins family) and Scott McDaniel (Angie's Scott) sang during the service, both accompanied by Robert (Barbie's Robert) with his base guitar.

Thank you so much to the Preachers who lead the service; Preacher Rudy Hearn from Green Bay Church, where Dave used to attend as a child (one of his Sunday school teachers still attends the same church), Pastor Johnson whom he knows Dave since childhood and Pastor Tim Kaiser from Open Bible Baptist Church where we attend Sunday services whenever we are in VA.

A special thank you to Pastor Kaiser who took his time meeting with us to make everything in order for the service and for putting up with me, with all the changes I had made up the last minute.

What can I say about Dave's sisters and their husbands but I am so blessed and grateful for them being there for me and the girls. Barbie did all the catering arrangement, Angie for the flowers and the birds, Delta and Jay for working until late morning for the slides and arranging for their friends to pick up the food and setting up the tables while we were at the service. All I did was say "No, Yes , I don't know or Talk to them" and gave them my credit card and my check book. They had to make sure that all of Dave's friend were there with complete military uniform on! But they had to approve on what I was to wear at the family night and at the memorial service and I had to pay for it!

Thank you to Uncle Will and Bette Lou for being at Dave's Mom's house every morning, making sure that the house and the food is put together, waking the girls up and making them pick up everything from their bedroom floor before family and friends start coming in with food, drinks etc.

Thank you to Bettina for watching the kids, Lisa and Toni (Delta and Jay's friends) for picking up the food and setting the tables for us.

Thank you so much Marie for all your help, Cathy and Wendell Hoskins for staying at home while we were at the family night.

Thank you so much to all the family and friends who were constantly bringing food, drinks and everything from cups, plates to toilet paper. Jocelyn was so amazed by this Southern hospitality!

Please continue with your prayers coming my way. I am still waiting for that day when it's get better.

Love,

Edith

DAVID'S GONE HOME TO BE WITH THE LORD!

Monday, August 13, 2007, at 2:57 P.M. David Adam Hoskins went home to be with his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He fought a good fight. His work is done. He was at home with his wife, Edith, his two daughters, Danica and Melissa. He was also surrounded by his mother, Loretta and his sisters, Barbie, Angie and Sissy. David also has an older brother Mike and a younger sister, Delta. Friends and family will be gathered at Scotts Funeral home in Chatham, Virginia on Thursday from 7:00 p.m. until 8:30 p.m. Funeral services will be Friday, August 17, at 1:00 p.m. at Greenbay Christian Church.
A celebration of David's life following the memorial service on Friday will be at his mother's home on Green Bay Road in Chatham, Virginia. All family and friends are invited.
The family wishes to thank everyone for all your thoughts, prayers and kind words through this difficult time. May God Bless you.
The Hoskins family